Speedrun of “Rage of Mages II”: Easy mode: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-6komN9i-Hc And hard: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SN7E-z0Yh2w
The poster alone is enough to make me regurgitate the tangerine I just ate. It was a pretty good tangerine, but this movie is a vom bucket. And judging from how she looks here compared to the poster for ‘The Thing About Pam’, they must have spent half the budget on Zellweger’s deaging cgi.
HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.
Fuckin’ lol. Damn dude. I knew it was goy slop shlocky romcom B movie, but not Dogshit Popcorn!
I figured I’d get some pushback on this review. I think the last time that happened was with “Talk To Me” (2022) because I said I didn’t mind the gaggle of negresses and changs in the cast. But for this, you can tell it’s a cheesy 90’s movie from the poster and release date. And the trailer. Didn’t think I needed to give a heads up about that.
I love 80’s and 90’s movies because they are unapologetically upbeat. I enjoy dark and gritty realistic movies but now everything is too self aware and makes meta jokes that break the fourth wall or try to one up each other with realism. I’m tired of every actor being ugly and frumpy. I want to watch gorgeous people LARP as normal.
Also, c’mon man! Loving animals is the Whitest thing you can do. Would love to read your review of “The Cove” (2009).
Anyways, hilarious excoriating review. Sorry to have led you astray.
Heads up: There’s some woke stuff sprinkled throughout the film, though it’s not the main focus of the story.
Beyond its surface narrative, “Angel Heart” can be interpreted as an allegory for the spiritual journey of an individual, revealing yet another layer of meaning. In this context, Harry Angel’s initial state represents a person unaware of their spiritual nature. The search for Johnny Favorite symbolizes the process of delving into one’s own soul. As Harry’s investigation deepens, it mirrors how turning one’s attention inward can uncover hidden, often unsavory aspects of one’s psyche.
This interpretation presents the film as a cautionary tale for spiritual seekers. It suggests that confronting one’s inner demons requires substantial mental fortitude and willpower. Without these qualities, one risks being overwhelmed by uncovered vices and passions, much like Harry is ultimately consumed by his own dark nature.
The film’s narrative echoes the experiences of hermits and ascetics who retreated to mountains and deserts for spiritual practices. While some found enlightenment, others were driven to madness, illustrating that not everyone can successfully navigate this challenging path.
“Angel Heart” thus warns that embarking on a journey of self-discovery should not be taken lightly. It implies that one should only open this metaphorical Pandora’s box when sufficiently prepared to face the challenges that arise and committed to changing oneself. Otherwise, this path may prove insurmountable and potentially destructive.
This additional layer of meaning elevates “Angel Heart” from a supernatural thriller to a profound exploration of the human psyche and the perils and necessities of spiritual growth, reminding us that true self-knowledge comes at a price and requires strength of character to confront and overcome the darker aspects of our nature.
Not all secrets need to be revealed.
chatgpt slop?
there’s overt homoeroticism daubed over the entire movie, how is that not woke? every sex joke has to be about guy-on-guy. the joke where the desk jockey has a crush on deadpool it’s a guy. when deadpool makes jokes to the soldiers about raping him they’re guys. the single case where it’s not a guy, it’s a black woman. otherwise heterosexual attraction is verboten. like yeah compared to deadpool 2 with the horrid dykes in it, it’s far less woke. but don’t try and make out that it has no woke in it.
lol
By the way, I do not recommend the book of the same name, on which this series was filmed. The original story has more depression and hopelessness, less humor and romance. In general, the creators of the series significantly reworked the original work, and this was to its advantage.
shonen trash
Absolutely *****
Sorry, bear with us. Trying to improve the UI and make it so you can add custom tags and custom ratings. But it’s a game of telephone and experimentation and discussion. Now that we have regular users it might be a better idea to finalize a feature before publishing changes to the site. We’ve always just done it step by step. But please be vocal if you feel like. That way we know what to reverse or what to double down on. Will add your “random” suggestion for the review widget soon. We also fixed the edit/delete option users requested but are still tinkering and getting the UI right for that.
You know what, I should have rated it higher, 4 point something.
J.J.
Well, not a fascist, just a Nationalist and I don’t meet that many fascist and natsocs, but yeah nationalist demo’s in the Netherlands and Flanders look exactly like that, though more amicable.
I watched this in a previous life, and I feel like I’ll get nightmares again just by seeing the poster.
long, detailed review, and managed to do so without spoiling much.
The messaging in this is terrible >your dad is secretly an evil killer >family men with normal lives are secretly evil killers >mystery meat pop stars good
Hey, could you add an option to let us delete/edit reviews after we post them? Sometimes there’s mistakes I don’t catch at first.